Living a life that Matters

This is one of those blogs that I’m not sure how it will come out. My thoughts are swirling and I’m having trouble coping. Maybe putting them out there will help.

Surrendering to God. It means to relinquish ownership of what we consider our to God. It doesn’t that we are going to stop living, but start living. God knows the plans for us and gives us the choice to give up desires and put our future in his hands. Yes, God gives us that choice. We are to surrender to God and resist the devil according to James.

One of the things my accountably partner mentioned was to surrender my past life. The things I did that kept me from living for God. The things that stood in the way. These are major steps to living a pure undistracted life. So I began to think of the things that I need to surrender to God.

I have no problem surrendering my past life. Did it.. have no desire to live that life. Alcohol, sexual desires, lust, money, my time that should be spend with God, etc. My past bad habits I want to put in the past. I’m all for that. But what I have trouble surrendering is people in my life.

I have become a deeply relational person. I care about people. And yes… I have had to let people that I’ve cared about go. But usually because either they hurt me, or they were a bad influence or they just simply moved away. I had to surrender those people from my life to God. Sometimes even family too.

But what I am struggling with is surrendering someone to God simply because I care too much about them. I know God wants our desires and our focus on him. But is it wrong to desire to spend time with someone? I guess if that person consumes your time and is steering you from your walk. But what if they encourage your walk. I know this might not make sense. I personally pour my heart into a lot of people. But there are times I feel that I need to let them go for myself so I can move on. This is hard for me to do because I’m someone who doesn’t give up easily on people. I struggle with this.. Especially for those who I have strong feelings for. Yet I wonder if there are times God calls us to surrender people we care about simply because we get too caught up on them and not Him. I am blessed with the people God brings in my life. Yet I know I know he has a plan for me and knows what is best for me. And he knows where I should be spending my time and energy. It is just so hard to let go.